Can You Hear Me?

"There is more hunger for love and appreciation in this world than for bread." ~Mother Teresa

"Hello God, are you there?  Can you hear me?"  How many times have you called out to God in this manner?  I will honestly say that I have heard myself asking this a few times throughout my life. Especially when things seem to be spiraling out of control.  You see at one point in my life I felt like God wasn't keeping watch over me.  I was a single mom with three babies that depended on me to meet their every need.  I clothed them, bathed them, fed them, taught them, and the list went on.  And just like Hagar, the single mom in the wilderness, I cried out in despair.  The food supply was running low.  My pockets were empty.  And I gave my portion to nourish and provide for my loves.  I felt overwhelmed, alone and rejected.  I just needed to be heard, seen and have my needs taken care of.

We all have this deep rooted desire to be seen. Not just by God but others.  And there are times when my desire is so overwhelming that instead of looking up I leap into the arms of another.  And so goes the story of my life.  I often look to "others" to affirm, value, assure, appreciate, connect, desire,  care, include and love me.  After all God did create me this way.  And all I really truly desire is to be loved. And the sad thing is I often define love by how others affirm, value, assure, appreciate, connect, desire, care and include me. Pretty twisted if you think about it.  Because that certainly isn't the way God defines love (1 Corinthians 13).  Lucky for me.  Because if He did I would really be in big trouble.  I fail to affirm, value, assure, appreciate, connect, desire, care and include God in my life on a daily basis.  I suppose this is why I often find myself at His feet asking for forgiveness.  I am constantly seeking the approval of fellow sinners.  It's easy to only let the world around me see the characteristics I pick and choose to reveal.  There is this fear of letting people see the whole package. I have to protect my heart from getting hurt. So I save the deep down dirty truth for an elite few.  But wait, hold the presses, El Roi.  Yes,God sees me anyway.  I don't have to reveal the ugly "naked" truth to Him.  He already knows the disgusting details.  Unlike the world around me I can stand naked and ashamed before Him.  He longs for me to come before Him.  Just so He can say,"I am the God who sees you.  I see you as beautiful, valuable, I desire to connect with you.  I appreciate what I have created in you.  But most important is this, I LOVE YOU!"

During the years of being a single Mom it was difficult to allow anyone into my heart.  I even struggled, at times, to let God in.   I was rejected, unappreciated, cheated on, broken, battered, afraid, and felt unworthy and unwanted.  It took a lot for me to trust God when He said that He would never leave me or forsake me.  But God was patient.  He knew that He had to reveal His promises slowly and in some pretty magnificent ways.  In the midst of my loneliness He was intricately paving the way for my future.  In retrospest, as I reflect back to those days, it is very clear that God had His eyes on me.  He was just giving me room to grow in His grace.

A few thought provoking questions for this week:

Can you think of a little gift God blessed you with in the past few months that reminded you that He does have a watchful eye on you? What happened?

What are some ways you could be more aware of God's presence?

Look up the names of God.....  What additional names would you give God based on your life experiences?

Reflect on a time when you saw God's handy work in retrospect.

Read 1 Corinthians 13.  Who is God to you?  How do you feel about the knowledge that this is the God who sees you?

I pray that as we prepare to celebrate Resurrection Sunday that we would take a moment to reflect on the amazing grace that God lavishes on us.  We are truly blessed.  I pray that He gives us eyes to see the glory that is around us.  The flowers are blooming and the once bare trees are being decorated with leaves and fruit blossoms.  As winter turns to spring I lift each of you up in hopes that your love for the Lord will be renewed. And that we would take time to affirm, value, assure, appreciate, connect, desire, care and include God in our lives.  But most important let His love fill your heart.