Friday, March 4, 2011

Break my Heart for What Breaks Yours.......

 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9

The house is quiet. And I decided to sit at my Saviors feet for a while. It was this morning that He whispered, “I am your refuge and your strength. I am your power in your weakness.”

Every morning and every night I pray that He would break my heart for the things that break His. And over the past few months He has given me a small glimpse. And I am overwhelmed.

For each child/adult child of this “family” I have asked God to show me His heart. And this included me. At first I thought this was going to be simple. I thought I can begin to “blend” this family with these new revelations. What was I thinking? What I began to see broke my heart.

Where is the Holy Spirit in my life? It became clear to me that I had quenched the Holy Spirit a long time ago. I took most of the glory. And never once did I think I was breaking my Father’s heart. I neglected to see that everything I did was to be all for His glory. And there were plenty of things of which I was ashamed. I tried to go an entire week without talking about other people in a harsh way. Failed. I tried to keep my cool when faced with controversy. Failed. I tried to keep my thoughts and words holy and pure. And guess what I FAILED. And this failure was all a result of me trying to live in the flesh and forgetting about the gift of the Holy Spirit within me. I quenched Him.

Now that hard part was seeing that even my “family” had followed in my footsteps and they too quenched Him. Here is the difficulty in it all. I saw through each of them how I break the Lords heart.
We know that God is ever present. However, we only give God a few minutes every day at best. We wake up. Gets ready for the day and then block quality time by watching TV instead of praising God for a new day. And God waits patiently for us. And because the Spirit has been quenched we don’t even realize that God’s heart is broken. We are all guilty of neglecting to spend special quality time with God. Just like we neglect to spend quality time with our loved ones on earth. Eventually our neglect causes hurt and later separation. And one day we wake up and realize that it’s all gone. Separation from God is a dark and scary place. And a family missing a member is like missing a limb. Eventually the body learns to go through everyday life. But there are things it will never be able to accomplish without that member. And this breaks hearts.

“When you were slaves to sin, you were free from the control of righteousness. What benefit did you reap at that time from the things you are now ashamed of? Those things result in death! But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life. For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 6:20-26
 
With each day, we find that the world has things to offer too. And there are moments we entertain the world by partaking. And this is a step towards quenching the Spirit. I know it all too well. I am prime example. He planted a seed in our hearts. And gave us each a mission. And sometimes our mission gets fuzzy because of all the noise and distractions around us. Sometimes this mission starts at home. Kindness, gentleness and compassion. When we neglect God’s plan for our lives these three little gifts can’t grow. We point the finger and yell. Then instead of allowing the Holy Spirit to work in and through us. We stomp our feet and run to our rooms. Shutting Him out. And this breaks hearts.

“Keep on loving each other as brothers. Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it. Remember those in prison as if you were their fellow prisoners, and those who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering.” Hebrews 13: 1-3 
As we grow other things become so much more important. School, Friends and work. And as a result we have forgotten our first love. There are two forces in the beginning of our lives. Our Mom and our Dad. I can only tell you what I know about mine. And that is that mine often love me more than I loved myself. Parents are often our example of how God our father loves us. God desires us to be upright. God tells us that we are to pray and go to our brothers and sisters and discuss how they hurt or caused us anger. Waiting and waiting for hours, weeks, months and even years is sin. If at that point nothing is resolved then go to the elders. We are commanded by God to work it out. We quench the Holy Spirit when we forget that we can do all things through Him who gives us strength. Remember when we are week He is strong. And when we walk away this give the enemy a foothold. And this breaks hearts.

“By the meekness and gentleness of Christ, I appeal to you—I, Paul, who am "timid" when face to face with you, but "bold" when away! I beg you that when I come I may not have to be as bold as I expect to be toward some people who think that we live by the standards of this world. For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10: 1-5
 When I think of my children I see some of the most honest people I know. They often have this tug of war going on inside. They wants to do the right thing but the wrong thing is really appealing. My one daughter often calls herself the “black sheep” of the family. And when things go wrong in this “family” she feels it’s her fault. She is not meek. When God said come here and get your dose of meekness. She ran because she thought He said geekness. And this would be typical for her. She has a really hard time “hearing”. She just wants to be heard. We all at times put on the bully suit. But it’s just a suit. Our hearts have been broken over and over. And this is when the line of thinking, that being hard and not meek is best, sets in. Don’t let anyone in or you’ll get hurt. What if God felt this way? Christ took the ultimate blow. And he was humble. Each of us is guilty of bitterness. We all need to realize that we are but a vapor. Don’t let the enemy grab hold of your heart and cause you to become hardened. Our meekness is a gift from the Holy Spirit. And not accepting this breaks hearts

“I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God—through Jesus Christ our Lord!” Romans7:15-25 
How can someone be a part of this “family” and not know the Lord? Well it’s simple. And this is where my heart hurts the most. I have often been a poor example. And everyone else in this house has followed my lead. If God is love and we are to become more and more like Him, how is it that we can be so divided. There is lack of unity, respect, kindness, forgiveness (and keeping no record of the wrong). Our example of His love is a very poor one at best. Why would a non believer want to be a part of something so divided. We as a “family” have been , at times, a poor representation of love to the unbelieving world. We need to stop looking at others and look deeper at self. Start pointing in the right direction. And become as selfless and forgiving as our Savior. This is where love grows. And this love is what we need to show the world. A lack of unity breaks hearts.
  “You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things. Now we know that God's judgment against those who do such things is based on truth. So when you, a mere man, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God's judgment? Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God's kindness leads you toward repentance? But because of your stubbornness and your unrepentant heart, you are storing up wrath against yourself for the day of God's wrath, when his righteous judgment will be revealed. God "will give to each person according to what he has done." To those who by persistence in doing good seek glory, honor and immortality, he will give eternal life. But for those who are self-seeking and who reject the truth and follow evil, there will be wrath and anger. There will be trouble and distress for every human being who does evil: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile; but glory, honor and peace for everyone who does good: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile. For God does not show favoritism.” Romans 1: 1-11

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